Where'd the joy go?

You know, it astounds me that I can write so optimistically about joy one day and then find it to be a complete bust the next. So, the previous blog was about how joy is not hard to find. The last few days I have not found it hard to find but I have found it hard to look for.

I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who has experienced unwillingness to budge from a grouchy, "poor me" position. It's just easier to soak in my selfishness. So, I'm sitting here tonight thinking about my rotten disposition and realizing that tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I know there will be joy hanging around somewhere tomorrow.

Will it be in the chocolate fountain?
Will it be in the turkey?
Will it be in the warm fire and glowing candles?
Will it be in our family games?
Will it be in our family prayer time?

I'm pretty sure joy will be there. It always seems to show up in time to slap me up side the head and put a smile on my face. I think I'll take a break and enjoy the joy. I can always go back to being grouchy later.

Look for joy!

This morning as I was reading a little book I got a women of faith conference, I was struck by the statement "Sometimes we have to go looking for joy. Good thing it's not that hard to find."

I put the book down in my lap and stared out the window. Is it possible that I've forgotten to look for joy? It's so much easier to look for problems and focus on what's not so joyful in our lives. As I looked out the window I realized that I suddenly wanted to find some joy. I rested my head back on the chair and breathed in the scent of the cinnamon buns I'd just made for my boys and listened to the Chris Tomlin CD I had playing in the background. Hmm.. Joy! It's not that hard to find!

Church was also an experience in joy this morning. People, I loved were there. Wonderful music and the cutest darn pastor I've ever seen. (Love you honey!)

Lunch with friends followed. Yep! More joy! Even now as I look at a sink full of dishes and pots and pans that need scrubbing, I can say, I feel joyful. Even happy! Those dirty dishes represent a wonderful afternoon spent talking, playing, singing, and holding my friends baby!

Well, the days not over yet. I am going to go in that kitchen and look for more joy! (Maybe I should start a bubble fight!_

Joyfully,
Joleen

piano lesson

So, I had my first piano lesson in twenty years today.

I'm not sure the teacher didn't want to throw-up after hearing my rendition of claire de lune.
The first words out of her mouth were, "Well, I'll warn you, I'm brutally honest."

Uh-oh.

She did not throw-up or throw me out though so I guess I'm okay. I did learn a ton of stuff. She's got me working on a Haydn sonata. I'm thrilled to be learning again!

The teacher is the student

Well, after twenty years, I am finally going to be a piano student again. Today is my first lesson with my new piano instructor. I am nervous and excited. I've been practicing all my scales and polishing my songs and feeling like I don't know anything about playing the piano. Funny how being the student puts the nerves in ya. I'll have more compassion for my own students now.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Matthew

Well, I am confused. For the past two days Matthew has been running, jumping, and acting like nothing is wrong with him. These episodes of not walking and being in apparent pain are so wierd.

We did go to the orthodpedic specialist yesterday. He ruled out Perthes, and Lukemia, and Lyme and a bunch of other scary stuff. Just when I was starting to think he was about to say, 'He's having growing pains, go home and let him rest and give him some vegetables!"

He says,
"What he's experiencing is not typical of growing pains and we need to rule out tumors or blood poisoning in the bones. " So, he's scheduled Matt for a bone scan on Nov.19th.

I am not freaking out! Really! I just can't see how it could be something like that. He's so completely normal today. Besides, if we are about to get some horrible news it won't do any good to freak out about now. (Yes, I'm preaching to myself)

So, we wait!
We watch for any further episodes.
We go the appointment on the 19th.

We'll keep you posted.

Matthew's limp

Well, we could sure use some prayers and wisdom right about now. My four year old, Matthew has had a limp on and off since September. Today it was so bad that he was crawling and only walking if he could support himself with things around the room. It was awful to see him crying and hanging onto the couch saying, "I can't get over there to that table Mommy."

So, I took him to ER. They took blood tests and x-rayed his hips down to his knees. Everything came back normal. The Lyme disease test results will come back tomorrow.

Matthew summed up both our frustrations when Jonathan asked him what happened today. Matthew said, "Well, Mommy took me to the doctor but the doctor didn't work."

I'll be calling our family doctor and the orthoped. specialist tomorrow to continue pursuing answers.

I'll keep you all posted on this site and on facebook!

Joleen